I've set my e-mail accounts to send you an auto-response in service of connection, so you can know your e-mail landed in my inbox.
I receive more emails than I can respond to in the amount of time I would like. If you don't receive a response from me in the time-frame that suits you, I invite you to support me in responding to you by re-sending your e-mail.
I am always aiming for brevity to support respect for others' priorities as well as my body which is limited in its capacity to sit and type. If what I write is not received as expressing care, please write again.
You might also like to read this post about short e-mails.
I'm open to hearing what it is like for you to read this explanation.
Be well,
Shulamit
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Did I send you a brief email message?
I value the finite time and attention that we all have available to us. I also find conversations to be rich and meaningful.
That said, I have a lot of email coming into my inbox. Maybe you do, too.
I am always aiming for brevity to respect others' priorities and to support my body which is limited in its capacity to sit and type. If what I write is not received as expressing care, please write again. My hope is that a timely, concise response respects you as much or more than a longer one because it is giving you the information you need quickly and more easily; you aren’t waiting for me to answer and don’t have to wade through a bunch of information to figure out what’s going on.
My brevity is intended to ensure I don’t bottleneck our conversation. I’m happy to have deeper connection and extended conversations. Please continue the conversation if it’s appropriate, and feel free to write in whatever length and style that feels comfortable for you. I don’t want my anti-bottlenecking practice to bottleneck you.
Also, I am open to receiving feedback on what it is like to have read this message, or to have received a brief message from me.
Be well,
Shulamit
PS If you’re curious about where I got my ideas for effective email management, and from whom I stole much of the wording for this post, check out http://www.productiveflourishing.com/how-to-write-brief-emails-without-being-a-jerk/ as well as these other free resources http://www.productiveflourishing.com/tag/email/ and this blog post http://www.martineve.com/2010/12/15/using-producteev-to-manage-overbearing-inboxes/
Monday, December 13, 2010
Telecourse: Integrating Nonviolent Communication and Focusing
Deep and Lasting Transformation of Consciousness through NVC and Inner
Relationship Focusing
A Telecourse with Gina Cenciose and Shulamit Day Berlevtov starting February 8th 2011.
There will be a free Introductory call with Gina and Shulamit on Tuesday
evening January 18th 2011, 7 pm to 8:30 pm Eastern time. Please contact shulamit at shula dot ca for more information or to register.
*In integrating NVC and Inner Relationship Focusing skills you will:*
• Learn how to be truly and deeply present with what is alive in you
moment by moment through any part of your life
• Connect with even the most stuck emotional reactions so they make sense
and release you
• Make clearer choices to respond to life as your whole self
• Make contact with your bodily felt senses, which are doorways into fresh
energy and new possibilities
• Learn a step by step PRESENCE PROCESS to embody radical empathy, radical acceptance of what is, and therefor open to real change and inner growth
To register: http://nvctraining.com/courses/telecourses/GC-SD/nvc-and-focusing-20110208/index.html
* *
Overview
Inner Relationship Focusing (IRF) is a process for emotional healing and
accessing positive life-forward energy. It has been developed by Ann Weiser
Cornell and Barbara McGavin primarily out of their own practice, based on
the Focusing work of Eugene Gendlin, with some influences from a number of other methods. (Cornell and McGavin, 2002.) Above all, the practice of IRF has been developed over 18 years of intensive work with clients who were engaging with difficult issues such as action blocks, addiction (primarily eating disorders), depressed and anxious states, and experiences of low self-worth. In addition to these types of issues, IRF has been developed with people who wanted to make decisions that were appropriate for them and to feel more confident in their own inner sense of rightness about their next life-forward steps. Despite its application to difficult life issues, IRF is not a method that is aimed at particular problem areas, but is
adaptable to any issue that a client has, including relationship issues and
even the suffering caused by pain and physical symptoms.
Like the Focusing method from which it emerges, IRF can be taught to people as a self-growth skill and can be done in pairs in a ‘peer counseling’
format. Networks of people doing IRF with each other in ‘Focusing
partnership’ have arisen in a number of places in the world, and since the
process can be done by telephone, partners do not need to be in the same
physical location in order to work with each other. Professionally, IRF can
be used by therapists, counselors, and other healing professionals in
conjunction with other modalities, and it can also be done as a stand-alone
practice by an ‘IRF Guide.
With Inner Relationship Focusing, you go directly to the place where you
have a deep body knowing about a situation. There is wisdom in our body-mind which we tend to ignore, partly because our modern, fast-paced,
head-oriented culture is just not set up that way.
This class is an introductory (Level One) class in Inner Relationship
Focusing. The curriculum will be presented in the light of NVC
consciousness, informed by the principles and practices that NVC nourishes.
We will learn to experience ourselves, our inner voices of criticism,
judgment, shame and blame, as well as our needs, freshly and from a more
holistic angle.
Inner Relationship Focusing gives us the capacity to see clearly what is
happening in the moment, to turn towards it and to accept it with love.
During this program, we will explore the Nonviolent Communication and Inner Relationship practices of empathy; and compassionate awareness that
cultivate acceptance, allowing us to genuinely embrace ourselves and each
other. You will have the opportunity to practice being with the parts of
your life that are judged and unforgiven. The workshop will include talks,
guided meditations called Focusing attunements, experiential exercises, and
discussion.
You will leave with a radical new approach to self-acceptance, and a new way to connect to all the levels of life happening inside of you, that you may
not be currently aware of.
Class Outline:
Each class will include a remembering (focusing attunement), 25-45 minute
teaching with feedback and questions, and small group practice, along with
harvesting and extended check out. Empathy buddies and Focusing buddies
between class sessions will also be included.
Course Schedule:
*A six-month program which meets every other Tuesday (12 sessions)*
*12 Tuesdays, February 8 - July 12, 2011 4:00 - 6:00 PM PST / PDT*
** ** Requested NVC Experience: Beginner.* This includes
anyone who has 16 hours or more of NVC training and has a grasp of the NVC basics. The basics of NVC will not be covered. Focusing experience is not requested; anyone with zero or more Focusing training is welcome to register for the course.
*Fee: $350.00 USD*
*All registrants receive access to all recordings of the course.*
*About Shulamit Day Berlevtov*
I support individuals in transforming what is painful and difficult into
meaning, space and new life. I am a spirit-body-mind coach, have passed my assessment for certification as a trainer in Nonviolent Communication, am a certified Focusing teacher and guide and a certified and registered Kripalu yoga teacher. I also offer reiki and the Tapas Acupressure TechniqueR.
Since experiencing a serious illness in 2002, my commitment to compassionate authenticity and total nonviolence for myself and others has framed my spiritual and life practice and political action. www.shula.ca
*About Gina Cenciose*
Gina has been a workshop leader, group facilitator (Certified community
building trainer and Restorative Circle facilitator) and teacher for 15
years. She has been teaching NVC full time for 7 years, and has trained NVC
trainers in year long to 3-year long NVC programs for 5 years. She leads 6
different yearlong Integration programs every year, and has co created and
facilitated NVC year long programs with other colleagues in 22 different
programs so far... She is certified with the CNVC and works as a certifying
coordinator with them. www.embodyingempathy.com
Relationship Focusing
A Telecourse with Gina Cenciose and Shulamit Day Berlevtov starting February 8th 2011.
There will be a free Introductory call with Gina and Shulamit on Tuesday
evening January 18th 2011, 7 pm to 8:30 pm Eastern time. Please contact shulamit at shula dot ca for more information or to register.
*In integrating NVC and Inner Relationship Focusing skills you will:*
• Learn how to be truly and deeply present with what is alive in you
moment by moment through any part of your life
• Connect with even the most stuck emotional reactions so they make sense
and release you
• Make clearer choices to respond to life as your whole self
• Make contact with your bodily felt senses, which are doorways into fresh
energy and new possibilities
• Learn a step by step PRESENCE PROCESS to embody radical empathy, radical acceptance of what is, and therefor open to real change and inner growth
To register: http://nvctraining.com/courses/telecourses/GC-SD/nvc-and-focusing-20110208/index.html
* *
Overview
Inner Relationship Focusing (IRF) is a process for emotional healing and
accessing positive life-forward energy. It has been developed by Ann Weiser
Cornell and Barbara McGavin primarily out of their own practice, based on
the Focusing work of Eugene Gendlin, with some influences from a number of other methods. (Cornell and McGavin, 2002.) Above all, the practice of IRF has been developed over 18 years of intensive work with clients who were engaging with difficult issues such as action blocks, addiction (primarily eating disorders), depressed and anxious states, and experiences of low self-worth. In addition to these types of issues, IRF has been developed with people who wanted to make decisions that were appropriate for them and to feel more confident in their own inner sense of rightness about their next life-forward steps. Despite its application to difficult life issues, IRF is not a method that is aimed at particular problem areas, but is
adaptable to any issue that a client has, including relationship issues and
even the suffering caused by pain and physical symptoms.
Like the Focusing method from which it emerges, IRF can be taught to people as a self-growth skill and can be done in pairs in a ‘peer counseling’
format. Networks of people doing IRF with each other in ‘Focusing
partnership’ have arisen in a number of places in the world, and since the
process can be done by telephone, partners do not need to be in the same
physical location in order to work with each other. Professionally, IRF can
be used by therapists, counselors, and other healing professionals in
conjunction with other modalities, and it can also be done as a stand-alone
practice by an ‘IRF Guide.
With Inner Relationship Focusing, you go directly to the place where you
have a deep body knowing about a situation. There is wisdom in our body-mind which we tend to ignore, partly because our modern, fast-paced,
head-oriented culture is just not set up that way.
This class is an introductory (Level One) class in Inner Relationship
Focusing. The curriculum will be presented in the light of NVC
consciousness, informed by the principles and practices that NVC nourishes.
We will learn to experience ourselves, our inner voices of criticism,
judgment, shame and blame, as well as our needs, freshly and from a more
holistic angle.
Inner Relationship Focusing gives us the capacity to see clearly what is
happening in the moment, to turn towards it and to accept it with love.
During this program, we will explore the Nonviolent Communication and Inner Relationship practices of empathy; and compassionate awareness that
cultivate acceptance, allowing us to genuinely embrace ourselves and each
other. You will have the opportunity to practice being with the parts of
your life that are judged and unforgiven. The workshop will include talks,
guided meditations called Focusing attunements, experiential exercises, and
discussion.
You will leave with a radical new approach to self-acceptance, and a new way to connect to all the levels of life happening inside of you, that you may
not be currently aware of.
Class Outline:
Each class will include a remembering (focusing attunement), 25-45 minute
teaching with feedback and questions, and small group practice, along with
harvesting and extended check out. Empathy buddies and Focusing buddies
between class sessions will also be included.
Course Schedule:
*A six-month program which meets every other Tuesday (12 sessions)*
*12 Tuesdays, February 8 - July 12, 2011 4:00 - 6:00 PM PST / PDT*
** ** Requested NVC Experience: Beginner.* This includes
anyone who has 16 hours or more of NVC training and has a grasp of the NVC basics. The basics of NVC will not be covered. Focusing experience is not requested; anyone with zero or more Focusing training is welcome to register for the course.
*Fee: $350.00 USD*
*All registrants receive access to all recordings of the course.*
*About Shulamit Day Berlevtov*
I support individuals in transforming what is painful and difficult into
meaning, space and new life. I am a spirit-body-mind coach, have passed my assessment for certification as a trainer in Nonviolent Communication, am a certified Focusing teacher and guide and a certified and registered Kripalu yoga teacher. I also offer reiki and the Tapas Acupressure TechniqueR.
Since experiencing a serious illness in 2002, my commitment to compassionate authenticity and total nonviolence for myself and others has framed my spiritual and life practice and political action. www.shula.ca
*About Gina Cenciose*
Gina has been a workshop leader, group facilitator (Certified community
building trainer and Restorative Circle facilitator) and teacher for 15
years. She has been teaching NVC full time for 7 years, and has trained NVC
trainers in year long to 3-year long NVC programs for 5 years. She leads 6
different yearlong Integration programs every year, and has co created and
facilitated NVC year long programs with other colleagues in 22 different
programs so far... She is certified with the CNVC and works as a certifying
coordinator with them. www.embodyingempathy.com
Monday, October 25, 2010
Focusing is a practical, physical way to open the body's consciousness to the transcendent giftedness of everything
The habit of felt sensing (Focusing) is a practical, physical way to open my body's consciousness to the transcendent giftedness of everything, including events that threaten biological life.
Living itself can be prayer. The body itself, which we so identify with mortality, is meant to be our conscious bridge into immortality.
It is the body process that creates an experiential faith.
The habit of felt sensing gives us the body-feel for how in the practical order we can live connected in this world of gift, no matter what happens to us."
Ed McMahon, BioSpiritual Focusing
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Shulamit Day Berlevtov offers guided Focusing sessions in person or by telephone at the rate of $75/session. You can save $25 when you buy a 3-session package for $200.
Free offer:
Three guided Focusing sessions.
Expires Oct. 31, 2010.
Some restrictions apply; please e-mail me shulamit at shula dot ca for details.
Three guided Focusing sessions.
Expires Oct. 31, 2010.
Some restrictions apply; please e-mail me shulamit at shula dot ca for details.
No matter what you do, when you know Focusing, it will go better.
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Righteousness and Justice
Who is a tzaddik or tzaddeikit? Who are the righteous of the world? R. Zalman Schachter Shalomi, in A Heart Afire writes: "Are they not those who are participating in righteousness at that moment? That is what we are talking about here, the will directed toward righteousness in any given moment. Those who participate in that "aggregate will" are the tzaddikim for whom G-d created the world."
It's interesting that the root of tzaddik (righteous person) is tz-d-k, which also forms tzedek (justice) and tzedekah (translated as charity but really means more the justice that comes from sharing the material wealth of which we are only... stewards). Therefore, I like to think of tzaddikim as justice-ers, people working to bring justice to the world.
Extending the thinking that G-D created the world for tzaddikim, we could conclude that G-d created the world on purpose as a place intended for social action and that humans are intended to work for justice: "Tzedek, tzedek, tirdof" ("justice, justice shalt thou pursue." Shoftim (Deuteronomy) 16:20). That pasuk goes on to imply that justice is what is necessary, it is in fact a prerequisite, for us to thrive and come into our inheritance (that is, the world in which we live).
It's interesting that the root of tzaddik (righteous person) is tz-d-k, which also forms tzedek (justice) and tzedekah (translated as charity but really means more the justice that comes from sharing the material wealth of which we are only... stewards). Therefore, I like to think of tzaddikim as justice-ers, people working to bring justice to the world.
Extending the thinking that G-D created the world for tzaddikim, we could conclude that G-d created the world on purpose as a place intended for social action and that humans are intended to work for justice: "Tzedek, tzedek, tirdof" ("justice, justice shalt thou pursue." Shoftim (Deuteronomy) 16:20). That pasuk goes on to imply that justice is what is necessary, it is in fact a prerequisite, for us to thrive and come into our inheritance (that is, the world in which we live).
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Change is our very nature
Positive disintegration
It is helpful and despair work to realize that going to pieces or falling apart is not such a bad thing. Indeed, it is essential to evolutionary and psychic transformation. For the individuals who, in confronting current anomalies of experience, allows positive disintegration to happen, it can bring a dark night of the soul, a time of spiritual void and turbulence. But the anxieties and doubts are creative, not only for the person but for society, because they permit new and original approaches to reality.
What "disintegrates" in periods of rapid transformation is not the self, of course, but its defenses and ideas. We are not objects that can break. We are open systems, whirlpools in a river of the ever flowing water, patterns that perpetuate themselves.
We do not need to protect ourselves from change, for our very nature is change. Defensive self-protection, restricting vision and movement like a suit of armor, makes it harder to adapt. It not only reduces flexibility, but blocks the flow of information we need to survive. Our "going to pieces," however uncomfortable a process, can open us up to new perceptions, new data, the responses.
From World as Lover, World as Self, by Joanna Macy, www.joannamacy.net
It is helpful and despair work to realize that going to pieces or falling apart is not such a bad thing. Indeed, it is essential to evolutionary and psychic transformation. For the individuals who, in confronting current anomalies of experience, allows positive disintegration to happen, it can bring a dark night of the soul, a time of spiritual void and turbulence. But the anxieties and doubts are creative, not only for the person but for society, because they permit new and original approaches to reality.
What "disintegrates" in periods of rapid transformation is not the self, of course, but its defenses and ideas. We are not objects that can break. We are open systems, whirlpools in a river of the ever flowing water, patterns that perpetuate themselves.
We do not need to protect ourselves from change, for our very nature is change. Defensive self-protection, restricting vision and movement like a suit of armor, makes it harder to adapt. It not only reduces flexibility, but blocks the flow of information we need to survive. Our "going to pieces," however uncomfortable a process, can open us up to new perceptions, new data, the responses.
From World as Lover, World as Self, by Joanna Macy, www.joannamacy.net
Monday, July 19, 2010
Enlightenment: the liberation of concepts
In Focusing, we learn that concepts can interfere with experiencing things as they are, freshly. I recently learned, through @Ali Miller, about a teacher called Gangaji. When I read Gangaji's writing about the nature of her enlightenment, I was deeply moved because I recognize what she calls the liberation of concepts. Her words make enlightenment accessible to me.
With Focusing, I already know how to experience without concepts, and have had many experiences of experiencing without concepts (so to speak). This connects me with the trust I feel in my body, as a result of what I have already known and experienced, that even more freedom is available to me as I move Focusing and felt-sensing out of the formal practice and into daily life. I feel excited and inspired about the next step forward in my understanding and lived experiencing that is supported by Gangaji's words:
"Even though there is a personality associated with this body, and a sense of a “person” in experience, it is continually revealed to be nothing in the face of truth. It is not possible to integrate this truth into anything else because truth already exists as everything and it always has. Instead, you can recognize is that your life is already inside this vastness or infinity; it is already a part of that integral whole. Then every situation in life is an opportunity to recognize the ground of beingness that holds it all.
Any thought of separation from this whole, however much suffering follows it, still is only a thought. Separation must be maintained, it must be thought, it must be proved, and it must be practiced to exist. Without this maintenance, the experience of separation vanishes.
However your daily life presents itself, whether it is a life devoted to monastic duties or a life in the midst of the world, every moment is an opportunity to realize who you are. True investigation reveals that whatever prior limitations you think keep you from who you are (be they grand or lowly) are nothing but concepts, concepts that, when not maintained by mind activity, cannot cause suffering. These concepts can be liberated so that you, as you are, can shine fully. This is the invitation extended to you."
From The End of All Excuses, by Gangaji.
http://www.gangaji.org/index.php?modules=content&op=all_excuses
With Focusing, I already know how to experience without concepts, and have had many experiences of experiencing without concepts (so to speak). This connects me with the trust I feel in my body, as a result of what I have already known and experienced, that even more freedom is available to me as I move Focusing and felt-sensing out of the formal practice and into daily life. I feel excited and inspired about the next step forward in my understanding and lived experiencing that is supported by Gangaji's words:
"Even though there is a personality associated with this body, and a sense of a “person” in experience, it is continually revealed to be nothing in the face of truth. It is not possible to integrate this truth into anything else because truth already exists as everything and it always has. Instead, you can recognize is that your life is already inside this vastness or infinity; it is already a part of that integral whole. Then every situation in life is an opportunity to recognize the ground of beingness that holds it all.
Any thought of separation from this whole, however much suffering follows it, still is only a thought. Separation must be maintained, it must be thought, it must be proved, and it must be practiced to exist. Without this maintenance, the experience of separation vanishes.
However your daily life presents itself, whether it is a life devoted to monastic duties or a life in the midst of the world, every moment is an opportunity to realize who you are. True investigation reveals that whatever prior limitations you think keep you from who you are (be they grand or lowly) are nothing but concepts, concepts that, when not maintained by mind activity, cannot cause suffering. These concepts can be liberated so that you, as you are, can shine fully. This is the invitation extended to you."
From The End of All Excuses, by Gangaji.
http://www.gangaji.org/index.php?modules=content&op=all_excuses
Friday, July 9, 2010
The great one, who went to the mountaintop said, "You can't solve nothing with violence!" Oscar Grant I
This video moved me deeply and made me cry last night. It's the grandfather of Oscar Grant III, a young Black man who was shot in the back by a white transit officer while being arrested, speaking on July 8, 2010, after an all-white jury convicted the officer of involuntary manslaughter.
Daisaku Ikeda, in an essay called the Courage of Nonviolence, writes, "Nonviolence is the highest form of humility; it is supreme courage. Prime Minister Nehru said that the essence of Gandhi's teachings was fearlessness. The Mahatma taught that "the strong are never vindictive" and that dialogue can only be engaged in by the brave. "
In Liberation Magazine (October, 1959) , the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King wrote, "There is more power in socially organized masses on the march than there is in guns in the hands of a few desperate men. Our enemies would prefer to deal with a small armed group rather than with a huge, unarmed but resolute mass of people."
I pray for the day when I can be a one in a huge, unarmed but resolute mass of people who are brave enough to live in dialogue, creating the very peace we wish to see in the world.
May we, Oscar Grant, his family, Johannes Mehserle, the jury members and every one of us affected by Oscar Grant's killing and the verdict against Johannes Mehserle, be filled with lovingkindness for ourselves and others.
May we all be free from suffering and the causes of suffering.
May we be well and happy.
May we know peace.
Daisaku Ikeda, in an essay called the Courage of Nonviolence, writes, "Nonviolence is the highest form of humility; it is supreme courage. Prime Minister Nehru said that the essence of Gandhi's teachings was fearlessness. The Mahatma taught that "the strong are never vindictive" and that dialogue can only be engaged in by the brave. "
In Liberation Magazine (October, 1959) , the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King wrote, "There is more power in socially organized masses on the march than there is in guns in the hands of a few desperate men. Our enemies would prefer to deal with a small armed group rather than with a huge, unarmed but resolute mass of people."
I pray for the day when I can be a one in a huge, unarmed but resolute mass of people who are brave enough to live in dialogue, creating the very peace we wish to see in the world.
May we, Oscar Grant, his family, Johannes Mehserle, the jury members and every one of us affected by Oscar Grant's killing and the verdict against Johannes Mehserle, be filled with lovingkindness for ourselves and others.
May we all be free from suffering and the causes of suffering.
May we be well and happy.
May we know peace.
Sunday, July 4, 2010
What we can offer one another
"The only thing I think we have to offer someone else is our own centredness, our own being all right, and knowing beyond a doubt that they're all right. If I know that about myself in a way that lets me know that about everyone, I speak with true authority, in the sense of knowing what is so. But if I don't have that experience of being all right, if I am afraid for you because I am afraid for me, all I have to offer you is my fear. "Maybe if you quit drinking..." or "Why don't you try such-and-such?" That all comes from my own fear.
I think it's disrespectful of someone else's life process to assume that they are inadequate to their experience. It would be good to follow that back and see how I am simply projecting my own fear of inadequacy onto them. I simply cannot know about someone else's life... The contribution I can make is to clean up what's mine... I can't remove the obstacles to your path, but I can avoid putting things in your way... I this way to do I most deeply vow to train myself."
Cheri Huber, Good Life: A Zen precepts retreat
I think it's disrespectful of someone else's life process to assume that they are inadequate to their experience. It would be good to follow that back and see how I am simply projecting my own fear of inadequacy onto them. I simply cannot know about someone else's life... The contribution I can make is to clean up what's mine... I can't remove the obstacles to your path, but I can avoid putting things in your way... I this way to do I most deeply vow to train myself."
Cheri Huber, Good Life: A Zen precepts retreat
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Discipline, submission and love
Inspired by Bindu Wiles' 21.5.800 challenge (see http://binduwiles.com/buddhism/my-new-project-21-5-800/) and her writing on discipline, "Discipline, the word we mostly cringe at (http://binduwiles.com/buddhism/discipline-the-word-we-mostly-cringe-at-21-5-800-day-8/comment-page-1/#comment-1158):
For me, I think of discipline as surrender, not as in I surrender to an opposing army but as in I surrender, swooning, into the arms of a lover.
If
- I envision the practice to which I submit myself as my lover,
- love infuses the act of surrendering myself to the lover,
- in surrender I reach out, not closing but rather opening to the fullness of the experience, as my vulva, vagina, cervix and uterus swell with blood to support the sexual experience
then the whole experience of submission or surrender to discipline is transformed.
There are some things in life - especially, for me, I have noticed, the subtle experiencings of my emotions, soul, spirit and heart - that require aspects of to submission or surrender, an opening and turning toward, for me to experience them at all. Otherwise they pass unnoticed. This has become most clear to me since beginning a personal practice of Focusing, which I do without fail a minimum of once a week, and often more.
I *love* the experience of discipline when I think if it this way. One of my yoga teachers said that if we are ready, the experience will happen. (I'm sure this is not unfamiliar to many of you.) Surrendering in love to discipline is how I make myself ready.
Bindu, thank you for opening the space in which I can reconnect with the juiciness in me in relation to this topic.
Shulamit
For me, I think of discipline as surrender, not as in I surrender to an opposing army but as in I surrender, swooning, into the arms of a lover.
If
- I envision the practice to which I submit myself as my lover,
- love infuses the act of surrendering myself to the lover,
- in surrender I reach out, not closing but rather opening to the fullness of the experience, as my vulva, vagina, cervix and uterus swell with blood to support the sexual experience
then the whole experience of submission or surrender to discipline is transformed.
There are some things in life - especially, for me, I have noticed, the subtle experiencings of my emotions, soul, spirit and heart - that require aspects of to submission or surrender, an opening and turning toward, for me to experience them at all. Otherwise they pass unnoticed. This has become most clear to me since beginning a personal practice of Focusing, which I do without fail a minimum of once a week, and often more.
I *love* the experience of discipline when I think if it this way. One of my yoga teachers said that if we are ready, the experience will happen. (I'm sure this is not unfamiliar to many of you.) Surrendering in love to discipline is how I make myself ready.
Bindu, thank you for opening the space in which I can reconnect with the juiciness in me in relation to this topic.
Shulamit
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Felt-sensing occurs in us every day
Eugene Gendlin gives an example of how felt-sensing occurs naturally:
"Imagine you have that funny feeling that you have forgotten something, a kind of inner discomfort or conflictual feeling inside yourself that just won’t go away. You scrunch up your face, bring your hand to your head, searching around inside of yourself. Not this, not that . . . and then, suddenly, “oh yes, it’s that!” Ah ha—you and that feeling have made contact. You are left with a sense of resolution for now understanding (i.e., being able to communicate) something that had been disturbing and unknown before." Gendlin, E. (1981). Focusing. New York: Bantam Books.
Focusing is a method for directly accessing this kind of knowing. With training or support, you can find the entry point to your embodied knowledge. After that, you can become able to stay long enough to interact with it. and surprising new steps of change, thought, and action can come from it.
Focusing is supported by a long series of operational research studies conducted first at the University of Chicago and now internationally.
I offer guided Focusing sessions or Focusing instruction. $75/hr or save $25 with a three-session package for $200.
"Imagine you have that funny feeling that you have forgotten something, a kind of inner discomfort or conflictual feeling inside yourself that just won’t go away. You scrunch up your face, bring your hand to your head, searching around inside of yourself. Not this, not that . . . and then, suddenly, “oh yes, it’s that!” Ah ha—you and that feeling have made contact. You are left with a sense of resolution for now understanding (i.e., being able to communicate) something that had been disturbing and unknown before." Gendlin, E. (1981). Focusing. New York: Bantam Books.
Focusing is a method for directly accessing this kind of knowing. With training or support, you can find the entry point to your embodied knowledge. After that, you can become able to stay long enough to interact with it. and surprising new steps of change, thought, and action can come from it.
Focusing is supported by a long series of operational research studies conducted first at the University of Chicago and now internationally.
I offer guided Focusing sessions or Focusing instruction. $75/hr or save $25 with a three-session package for $200.
www.shula.ca
shulamit@shula.ca
613-868-9642 (Eastern Canada time zone)
shulamit@shula.ca
613-868-9642 (Eastern Canada time zone)
Monday, May 17, 2010
The 'Why', 'What' and 'How' of Restorative Circles. An interview with Dominic Barter
The 'Why', 'What' and 'How' of Restorative Circles. An interview with Dominic Barter and Information on Restorative Circles facilitator training in Ottawa, June 3-8, 2010.
An Introduction to Restorative Circles with Dominic Barter from Restorative Circles on Vimeo.
Restorative Circles Introduction and Facilitation Modules Ottawa, Ontario June 3-6 and 7-8, 2010 To register contact the CICR | |
Canadian Institute for Conflict Resolution
in partnership with
NVC Ottawa-Outaouais
Presents
Restorative Circle
Building Compassionate Conflict Resolution Systems
June 3 to 6, 2010
Plenary in English: consecutive translation as needed.
Documents and breakout groups will be in choice of English or French.
Restorative Circles allow individuals and communities to establish connection, discover meaning and recover power on profound levels. They create a forum for reaching agreements that help sustain effective and nurturing relationships both personally and within society.
Circles have developed within the RJ (Restorative Justice) movement, which in recent decades has adapted ways for communities to promote responsibility and healing. Rethinking justice, and engaging to consciously build whole-system responses to people’s well-being, has opened up revolutionary possibilities for furthering a culture of peace.
Restorative Training
June 3rd, the first evening, is gratis and open to all friends & families: an intro to 5 pre-requisites for creating RC in communities.
The next 3 days dynamically explore the key assumptions underlying the RC model which Dominic Barter has been sharing all over Brazil for years.
Participants may experience loosening of closed ideas, uncovering of human motives behind painful choices and discovery of effective strategies to meet pressing needs. They will partake first-hand in the RC process, with step-by-step integration of both RC & NVC skills.
NVC is a skill which affirms that we, human beings, share common, universal values (such as needs for community and respect), as well as a desire to see these needs met. By focusing on these shared values, and then moving on to strategies, there can be found solutions which are more satisfying, empowering and sustainable.
NVC is based on the premise that each of us can access our remarkable inner resources if we are given empathy, and that we all fare much better if we know how to do this in collaboration.
Gina Cenciose
Gina has been a practitioner of nonviolence and conflict resolution for many years.
She is a certified community-building facilitator, a certified trainer for the Center for NVC and a Restorative Circle (RC) facilitator. She has been sharing NVC full-time for seven years in prisons, hospitals and non-profits.
She currently runs seven year-long NVC Integration programs, and also mentors others through the Center’s certification process.
Gina offers and teaches NVC-based mediation in families, businesses & groups of all kinds.
A long-time colleague of Dominic’s, Gina has been facilitating Restorative Circles in different environments since learning this wonderful model directly from him.
Valérie Lanctôt-Bédard
Valérie has been teaching NVC since 2003. She intervenes in a variety of environments – including all kinds of organizations at work, couples and families and therapeutic relations in health centers, where she offers empathy in dealing with anger, beliefs, grief, healing, change, parental skills and social activism.
She also works with individuals on their life path, sharing her 15 years of experience as an entrepreneur, facilitator and therapist.
She is a certified trainer of the Center for NVC and co-founder of the Québec Circle of Certified Trainers.
For more information on both trainers:
www.nvc-transformation-cnv.com
*****************************
$550, 00 plus GST
$495, 00 before May 6th plus GST
$275, 00 for students plus GST – Thursday night free
Location: Saint Paul University, 223 Main Street, Ottawa, ON K1S 1C4
Time
Thursday Evening: 7:00 pm to 9:30 pm
Friday: 9:00 am to 5:00 pm
Saturday: 9:00 am to 5:00 pm
Sunday: 9:00 am to 3:30 pm
For those with RJ background: experience how inserting NVC's ABA-type listening can enhance resolution sustainability.
For those with NVC background: experience how deepening NVC dialogue can empower facilitation of circles.
For those wanting to contribute to ‘peace’: experience the immediate ‘vigor', in your community, of this unique combination of Alternate Dispute Resolution skills!
NVC Ottawa-Outaouais is a non-profit network offering NonViolent Communication-based facilitation, mediation, practice groups and teaching in businesses and communities.
| Restorative Circle II | |
Canadian Institute for Conflict Resolution
in partnership with
NVC Ottawa-Outaouais
Presents
Restorative Circle II
Building Compassionate Conflict Resolution Systems
June 7 & 8, 2010
and
October 1 & 2, 2010
Plenary in English: consecutive translation as needed.
Documents and breakout groups will be in choice of English or French.
Restorative Circle allows individuals and communities to establish connection, discover meaning and recover power on profound levels. They create a forum for reaching agreements that help sustain effective and nurturing relationships both personally and within society.
Circles have developed within the RJ (Restorative Justice) movement, which in recent decades has adapted ways for communities to promote responsibility and healing. Rethinking justice, and engaging to consciously build whole-system responses to people’s well-being, has opened up revolutionary possibilities for furthering a culture of peace.
Dominic Barter, the certified trainer in charge of the RJ project for the Center for NVC, has created a wonderfully empowering & sustainable restorative process!
www.nvctraining.com/media/GC/
Restorative Training
These two days dynamically deepen the key assumptions underlying the RC model which Dominic Barter has long been sharing all over America.
They are the next steps to developing the skills required to facilitate an RC after participating in a 3-day Intro. Because everyone comes from a different background and level of expertise, Dominic recommends a total of 9 days of training in this particular model of facilitation. Participants will learn to hone their awareness of group dynamics and they will specifically evolve:
° Deep clarity around the whole process and each of its steps,
° Self-awareness and self-care,
° Co-facilitation with other people,
° Flexibility and creativity,
° Interrupting and focusing to track meaning,
° Staying connected with the RC intention throughout, while skilfully intervening in a group,
° Empathic listening and guessing,
° Making clear observations,
° Identifying a doable action plan within a specific time frame.
This 2-day experience will be highly interactive with demonstration, practice, individual coaching and group debriefing of each step.
Gina Cenciose
Gina has been a practitioner of nonviolence and conflict resolution for many years.
She is a certified community-building facilitator, a certified trainer for the Center for NVC and a Restorative Circle (RC) facilitator. She has been sharing NVC full-time for seven years in prisons, hospitals and non-profits.
She currently runs seven year-long NVC Integration programs, and also mentors others through the Center’s certification process.
Gina offers and teaches NVC-based mediation in families, businesses & groups of all kinds.
A long-time colleague of Dominic’s, Gina has been facilitating Restorative Circles in different environments since learning this wonderful model directly from him.
Valérie Lanctôt-Bédard
Valérie has been teaching NVC since 2003. She intervenes in a variety of environments – including all kinds of organizations at work, couples and families and therapeutic relations in health centers, where she offers empathy in dealing with anger, beliefs, grief, healing, change, parental skills and social activism.
She also works with individuals on their life path, sharing her 15 years of experience as an entrepreneur, facilitator and therapist.
She is a certified trainer of the Center for NVC and co-founder of the Québec Circle of Certified Trainers.
For more information on both trainers:
www.nvc-transformation-cnv.com
******************************
$375, 00 plus GST
$350, 00 before May 6th plus GST
$200, 00 for students plus GST
Location: Saint Paul University, 223 Main Street, Ottawa, ON K1S 1C4
Time
9:00 am to 5:00 pm
For those with RJ background: experience how inserting NVC's ABA-type listening can enhance resolution sustainability.
For those with NVC background: experience how deepening NVC dialogue can empower facilitation of circles.
For those wanting to contribute to ‘peace’: experience the immediate ‘vigor', in your community, of this unique combination of Alternate Dispute Resolution skills!
NVC Ottawa-Outaouais is a non-profit network offering NonViolent Communication-based facilitation, mediation, practice groups and teaching in businesses and communities.
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